BY AGNES URUEMU OGHENEVWARHE
Relationship can be likened to a journey that presents many surprises – some exquisite, others painful. A healthy relationship is one of the best supports in our lives. Why? It improves every aspect of our lives. Healthy relationships should build each other up and not put each other down. Below are some healthy relationships;
COMMUNICATION
Good communication is an important part of a healthy relationship. Lack of communication increases distances, as a result when you want to discuss something important with your partner, the connection and understanding may no longer be there. You can work through problems together when you always communicate. As such, it is important you understand your partner’s method of communicating.
Don’t always assume your partner knows what is in your mind when you don’t communicate them. Your partner is not a mind reader, and besides what you need and wanted few months might be different at the moment. Communication should be honest and direct. Both partners should be comfortable expressing themselves, it will help to reduce confusion and conflict.
FORGIVENESS
In relationship, you cannot escape each other’s faults. Consequently, the willingness to forgive is essential. A healthy relationship is impossible without forgiveness. When you make a mistake, admit it and find a humble way to say you are sorry. Apologize sincerely when you make a mistake, because sincere apologies are deposits, however, repeated apologies are interpreted as insincere, resulting in withdrawals.
Any time you give conditions for your mistakes, you create defensiveness and insecurity, breaking down the bonds of your relationships. Learning to say “I am sorry” is important in every relationship. Apology does not show your weakness, but rather it shows your strength. A humble apology will win your respect, help build a trusting relationship and enhance your own peace of mind.
ACCEPT YOUR PARTNER FOR WHO THEY ARE
The most important ingredient we put into any relationship is not what we say or do, but who we are. Unless your partner believes you understand him/her they will be too angry, defensive, guilty or afraid to be influenced. You cannot change your partner. Real change comes from the inside out. By understanding your partner, you can learn his/her paradigms through which he/she views the world. Only then, you can try to resolve your differences to work together.
Since both of you are imperfect, misunderstandings and differences are inevitable. Therefore, one of the most important skills in a healthy relationship is the ability to resolve disagreements in a loving way. When you deeply understand each other, you open the door to creative solutions. Your differences are no longer stumbling blocks to communication and progress. Instead, they become the stepping stones to synergy.
TRUST
A relationship of trust leads to greater probability of successful and productive interactions. High trust level leads to high cooperation and communication. Showing integrity is a plus. Lack of integrity can undermine almost any effort to create a high trust reserve. Integrity requires conforming reality to your words, keeping promises and fulfilling expectations.
Trust will make you to be open to each other share your dreams and inner most thought and feelings together. In order to keep trust alive, both parties should try to keep commitments because breaking a promise is a major withdrawal.
AVOID STRESS
Try to walk away from unnecessary conflict and stop complaining too much. If you prolong argument and argue about everything, it will get to a point where both of you will be completely stressed out. Winning a heart is greater victory than winning an argument. Problems should be seen as opportunities to deeply understand and help one another.
Giving your partner room to correct mistakes and avoid putting blames on each other reduces stress in relationship. When you blame your partner you give up your power to change and improve. The longer you dwell on your partners weakness, the more you affect your own mind with unhappiness.
RESPECT
A healthy relationship should be based on mutual respect. No matter how upset you are, never launch a verbal attack on your partner. Some partners get into the wrath of hearing without listening and speaking without communication. If you respect your partner, you will listen when he/she communicates.
It is very hurtful for someone you care about to speak thoughtlessly to you. When you respect each other in words and attitude, it will help to build a healthy relationship. Remember respect is reciprocal. So, think carefully before giving a reply and try to respect your partner’s privacy.
SPEND TIME TOGETHER
Spend quality time together and say things that will make you laugh. Most partners who have been in long term relationship find it difficult to spend time together due to busy schedule at work and other engagements. Making out time together helps to strengthen the bond of the relationship.
Find something you enjoy doing together. It could be something new or something you have done a long time ago. Having a good sense of humor can help to reduce tension and anxiety. Spending time with your partner leads to intimacy and it helps to discover a lot of things about your partner.
APPRECIATE YOUR PARTNER
Learn to appreciate each other every day. Avoid a relationship where you are cast in the shade. Thankful words do not cost much, yet they accomplish so much. When you noticed a positive behavior, it is good to express appreciation. Healthy relationships are characterized by partners who make sure they feel appreciated.
UNITY
Set strong boundaries that show you value your relationship. Do not allow anyone or anything to weaken your relationship. The key to a healthy relationship is not to be afraid of conflict, but the unity to handle conflict with a sense of maturity.
Unity integrates partners who are different yet engaged in a shared enterprise. When the relationship is in harmony, each partner benefits from an enhanced energy that allows each to make a greater contribution than either one could have made alone.
